So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
