something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
