What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
