Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
