i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
