There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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