no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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