did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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