I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
