We named our party play list daddy issues
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
