what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
and she was petting her beer can
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Randomize
