How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
