12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I need a beard to bite.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
