she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize