and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
