Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize