My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
