Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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