I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
