you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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