I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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