operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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