Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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