During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
