My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
