look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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