I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
