some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
