i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
