I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
