if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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