I CAN MOONWALK!
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Randomize
