well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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