I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
