She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
