Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
They are going to name an STD after you.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
