Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
