Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
