loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I am naked and annoyed.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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