These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
