let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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