I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
