told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
