I think I died a long time ago.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
