yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize
