This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
