check it out our google latitudes are spooning
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
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