hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
My brain says no but my pants say off.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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