The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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