State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
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