oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
