Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
