Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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