Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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